ximilialog | OPEN // october post-mission log

CHARACTERS: James T. Kirk & you!
LOCATION: Around the station
DATE: second half of October
CONTENT: post-mission stuff: training/sparring, space lessons, drawing, attempts at cooking, all the while pretending he hasn't been shot
WARNINGS: none for now, will update if need be

INFIRMARY ➢ CLOSED to Erik

[ Adrenaline has been fueling his body for a while now, having allowed him to power through the gunshot wound he took to his shoulder during the heist. It's not looking too bad either, but he definitely lost some blood, and the area around the injury is swollen and aching. He's also looking a little paler than usual, which at this point is to be expected.

He's making a good job of acting as though it doesn't bother him much, though. Behind pressed lips, he grits his teeth while he gets the wound cleaned and bandaged, while he's told that he needs to wait for a little longer before anyone can stitch it up properly, or heal it altogether. He doesn't complain, just nods in agreement, then leans back on the bed, preparing himself to wait for a while until anyone can check his injury. ]

WORK OUT THE STRESS ➢ OPEN

[ Working out is quite possibly not the brightest idea he's had so far, but also: it's been almost a week now, and Jim is absolutely done with sitting around taking it easy. His shoulder is still sore, but at this point he doesn't really care anymore. He can power through it, he's dealt with much worse than this.

So he's made it to the training room, where he's going through a few individual training exercises. He might be doing something more active like HITT training or boxing moves, or other times he'll be going through various yoga positions, which help him with the soreness on his shoulder. On occasion he will be likely looking like he's struggling, but good luck having him admit to that. ]

SPACE LESSONS ➢ OPEN

[ Now back on the station, Jim plans to resume the classes he's offered to anyone who wants to learn more about space. He's contacted anyone who's shown interest, has invited everyone to spread the word if anyone else wants to show up, and he's also put together some reading material on basics of space, how it divides into galaxies and solar systems, how orbits work, what kinds of astronomical objects there are. With questions about how people don't "fall off planets", he has also included a bit of information about gravity, and he's now at the mess hall at an arranged time, with a few books and tablets where he and whoever shows up can go through some information. ]

KITCHEN NIGHTMARE ➢ OPEN

[ So, Jim technically doesn't know how to cook. That said, he's been trying to learn. Mostly on his own, relying on recipes he finds and tips and tricks he's learned from reading, but he's quickly realizing that putting theory to practice is pretty tricky when it comes to cooking.

At least he hasn't set fire to the kitchen yet, but he may be struggling a little between something frying, some batter he's got that looks somewhat overbeat, or just cursing while he tries to disperse a small cloud of smoke that emerges when he opens the oven door. ]

Damn it...

HERE COMES THE SUN ➢ OPEN

[ The sunlight room is another place Jim enjoys visiting, during this downtime. He has with him a sketchbook and some drawing supplies, and finding a quiet spot to sit, he entertains himself sketching various things. Whether the scenery he has here, or other things from memory, like his ship; on occasion he may be even trying to draw simple portraits of people he knows, both from home and from the station. He's pretty immersed in it, but he will welcome any company, and he's quick to offer a small smile when approached. ]

Have a seat, if you want.

WILDCARD! ➢ OPEN

[ Would you like to run into Jim anywhere else on the station? Feel free to pull out your wildcard and write a starter of your own! ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It's the only place that's different from everything else.

[ The rest is just more of the same. Even the observation deck is depressing, when there is practically no light, nothing outside for them to look at. ]

But we can go anywhere. The labs, the training room, the simulation room. Or we can just stay here. As long as you're with me, I don't care.

I'm fine either way.

[ but he's curious. ]

What makes it so different?

It doesn't feel like you're on a station. I know it's not real, technically speaking, but we can see it, smell it, feel it and touch it. Real enough to me.

We have holosuites similar to that, where I'm from. Usually you have a number of programs you can choose from, though. I interacted with them a lot while I was at the Academy.

[ erik nudges him lightly. ]

You have a fave?

Mm, not sure. I liked the flight simulations, but they tended to get a little repetitive and didn't have a lot of wiggle room. I never really spent much of my free time in simulation rooms just for fun.

[ He's quiet for a moment, then he adds with a glance at Erik. ] That Wakandan sunset was pretty amazing, though.

[ erik falls silent for a moment. ]

I was told they're the most beautiful in the world. Least, that's what my Pa said.

I think he was onto something, there.

[ As much as it was obviously a biased opinion. Jim happens to agree. He's seen plenty of sunsets, and that one was much unlike any he'd seen before. ]

Probably. He was a smart guy, my dad. Wanted the best for his people, all around the world.

Sounds like good work. [ He smiles a little. ] I'd have liked him, I think.

. . . I hope so.

[ This topic tends to be less of a solid ground with Erik, and he's a little less sure how to find his footing, but he tries anyway. ]

Ever thought about taking on that work? Follow in his footsteps, so to say. I know you mentioned not being sure what to do from here on.

[ erik shakes his head. ]

According to Shuri 'n the others, it's already being taken up. I doubt my name or my dad's has much say there, but it's out of our hands now.

Just because someone else is doing it already, doesn't mean you can't too. I find that the more people work together towards a common goal, the easier and quicker it is to achieve it.

But anyway, I only meant that— even if you don't get to go back, you could still do good for others elsewhere.

[ he shrugs. ]

Maybe. It's all tied up in knots. My past, my future. Not really sure I can start fresh, just like that.

You shouldn't have to leave your past behind for that. It's part of who you are. But it doesn't mean you can't build on it, let it be the foundation for something new.

[ erik frowns. ]

Not sure how much you can build on violence.

[ That gets a short, quiet laugh from him. ]

Have you looked at the whole of the history of mankind? Even in my time, where peace is prevalent, so much was built on a violent past. We didn't shed that, we don't forget it. It's important to remember, and to own up to it.

[ well that is factually true, erik knows it's a little more complicated in his case. ]

Do you know what my scars mean?

I do. They're all the people that you've killed, isn't that right?

[ They never really talked about it, but Jim's smart, and perceptive. He's pretty sure he got it right. ]

[ he nods. ]

Violence was the only way I knew how to do anything. Violence made me stronger. Violence helped me get a foothold for other Black people. If I wasn't, nothing would have changed.

It's still all I know.

It's not all you know.

[ He squeezes Erik's hand tighter. ] And it's not all that you have to know. There are endless possibilities. You could do anything, now.

[ erik is just not convinced of that. it feels it's in too deep to be fully extricated. and when push comes to shove, what instincts will come out of him? ]

I just don't know.

I know.

[ He knows that people are capable of change, of doing better; it's not exclusive to Erik. Of course that they have to want to. ]

Just wish you'd give yourself a little more credit.

I probably just need some time.

Not sayin' it's a lost cause.

I wouldn't be here if you were.

[ Jim smiles. That may also mean he'll never stop trying to encourage Erik. ]

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