singlelogbridge: (180)
Wei Wuxian | 魏无羡 ([personal profile] singlelogbridge) wrote in [community profile] ximilialog2022-09-17 03:09 pm

Open | RIP Sebastian + catch all

CHARACTERS: Wei Wuxian, a giant dead crab, and you!
LOCATION: The kitchen/mess hall
DATE: September 17th
CONTENT: Eating crabs
WARNINGS: None at the moment



A

[The day after their return from Xrisora, Wei Wuxian can be found having taken over one of the stoves in the kitchen. Lying on the counter next to him are two crab legs—that is, two giant crab legs from a Titan Crab. How did he get them here? It is a mystery. Anyway, he’s taken over a part of the kitchen with his crab shenanigans and is slowly but surely beginning to cook one of the legs up. After a while, he makes the executive decision to freeze a leg and a half because there is absolutely no way they’ll be able to eat all of it.

Anyway, he is cooking so much crab.

At some point he is absolutely burning some of the crab. Maybe someone can supervise? Please come save the crab.
]

B

[Somehow, most of the crab gets cooked without being burned or ruined in some other way, which means it is time to season it! Do you like your crab spicy? Obviously you do, why wouldn’t you? Who doesn’t like spice? Only crazy people, that’s who!

Thankfully, Wei Wuxian is friends with Itachi which means he’s aware that some people on the station can’t handle spice. This means that most of the crab is boring and only has some melted butter on it, and absolutely zero eye searing red flakes and spices.

Everyone should help themselves to crab. Their options are terrible, boring, (perfectly fine) normal crab, or delicious, stunning, wonderful (hope you didn’t need your tastebuds or your esophagus!) spicy crab.
]

C
[And at some point, a text across the network.]

I’m making crab!

[That’s it, that’s the text, he doesn’t have time for this network nonsense, his pan is on fire!]

D

[Wildcard it! Crab related or other!]
adept: (surprise)

[personal profile] adept 2022-10-26 04:16 am (UTC)(link)
[ Yuri likes to think of himself as a realist. And so, he's quite sure he's about to set his mouth on fire.

His expectations are met — even exceeded — when he forks a small bite. Immediately, his eyes burn, and he grabs the milk he'd brought over. Only once he's gulped that down does he try to speak, his voice somewhat choked by the experience. ]


You've got some fortitude, I'll give you that.