open ; catch all for October

[bossily]

CHARACTERS: Clara Oswald & OPEN
LOCATION: Around the station
DATE: 10/17-10/21
CONTENT: Clara pops back onto the station after a canon update
WARNINGS: Mentions of death


I. Twice Returned
[Time is such a funny thing, really. In her time spent traveling with the Doctor, she's come to understand that it can be such a meaningless thing. Except for when it's important. And in the series of events that have just unfolded for her, time feels incredibly important. Vital, even.

The thing is, she remembers being on the station before. Remembers her friends there, and the missions. And she remembers the orbs. It had all been one big adventure before. But then she was sent back, gone in a blink of an eye. For those close to her, it's not likely they even will notice she's gone. For her though, time passes more slowly. Hours turn to days away, and days to week. Before she knows it, years have passed. Time spent aging and growing, developing into a different person. Clara Oswald has a home on Earth maybe, but she no longer feels the same sort of attachment to it that she once had. With the loss of Danny Pink and the intensity of her connection growing stronger with each adventure after, Clara's left more and more of her life on Earth behind.

Sure, it's fine to tap in and out of London to check in on people like Rigsy. People who are friends. People who -

Well, people who Clara's willing to die for. Her reckless streak has finally caught up to her in the form of a chronolock. One that's recently taken her life. Or maybe it took her life billions of years ago, things are a bit fuzzy at the moment. She recalls coming back, recalls learning the Doctor spent billions of years in a personal hell because of her dying. She recalls stealing her own TARDIS, recalls making the one person she loves more than anyone forget everything about her.

She had done it for his own good, and the good of the universe. It's a bit hard to justify staying together when you know an entire prophecy was written as a warning to keep you apart. It won't do to have their relationship bring on the hybrid.

Which is exactly why she's confused as she's pulled back into the station and has to try and sort things out. Is the Doctor still here, she wonders. Have billions of years passed here too? Only a few days? Weeks?

Time had started to feel meaningless for her.

That was before the raven swooped in and changed everything.

Now it feels increasingly important to pinpoint exact moments in time. Her fingers press against the inside of her left wrist as she slowly navigates the hallways. There's a heartbeat there. But there shouldn't be. When she bumps into someone as she walks she owlishly blinks up at them, her fingers slipping away.]

How long has it been since the last mission?



II. Sunlight Room
[For those that know her well enough, it's easy to tell that something is a little off. She looks a little older in her face, her eyes holding a maturity that she had previously been lacking. She's seen and been through so many things in her time away that being back here almost feels surreal. It doesn't feel like it should be possible.

But she's the impossible girl, or at least she once had been. She knows from experience that anything is possible. Usually she's the one forcing the impossible to happen. There's almost something comical about the fact that she finally was in full control of her own destiny. She had the ability to be the Doctor in her own right, traveling whenever and wherever she wanted. She could face her death when she was ready and go back to it the long way around.

She finally had all the control she wanted, only to have it torn away from her again. But she knew now she had a distinct purpose for being here. She couldn't remember her regret from before, but knew that it couldn't be as important as the one she wanted to undo now. She would do whatever it took to protect the Doctor. Even if it meant rewriting time itself.

She stands in the sunlight room, head tipped so she can peer up at the artificial light. It's almost like she's looking for something. She hears the sound of someone walking past and reaches out to grab hold of their hand. There's no words at first, no sign of what she wants. Really, she's just desperate for some kind of contact right now. A reminder to anchor her to the reality of being back and having a purpose again.]

Do you think this station had a purpose before we all arrived here?


III. Kitchen

[Apparently coming back to life and getting her heartbeat back means that the threat of being caught between her last heartbeat and death doesn't have to be an immediate threat. What is the immediate issue is that no amount of food seems to be enough. Clara's typically anxious over the amount of supplies on the station and worrying about whether or not everyone has enough. She started her hydroponic garden to help ensure the children have plenty to eat. But now that concern is far from her mind as she camps out in the kitchen and eats.

She spends hours grazing her way around the kitchen, only pausing when she catches sight of someone else entering. Her mouth is usually full when this happens, and she swallows what's in her mouth to try and awkwardly smile.]

Right, so...I can explain.

[She still thinks supplies are an issue and she should apologize for just stuffing her face this way.]


IV. Personal Quarters - closed close CR
[Clara spends as little time as possible in the room she shares with the Doctor. She finds herself not really wanting or needing to sleep those first handful of days back, only getting some catnaps here and there around the station. But when she finally feels disgusting and in ready of freshening up, she makes her way back to her quarters at long last.

After cleaning up and getting a change of clothes, she spends an extraordinary amount of time looking in the small mirror hanging on the wall by her bed. Typically her ego doesn't see any issue with admiring her reflection. Her purpose for looking today has little to do with how amazing her hair looks or how on point her eyeliner is. No, she's far more concerned about something else. It's easy to pretend like she hasn't been gone at all with the others. When it comes to the Doctor...well, she has her concerns. He'll be able to tell she's different immediately, just from the look in her eyes.

But it's the number that's tattooed on the back of her neck that she's worried about. Is it even still there? Clara gathers up her short hair to lift it up and turn in a way she can look at what she's afraid will be there. And sure enough, the numbers 001 are there, taunting her. There's no escaping the chronolock. Even here in another dimension and possibly even another universe entirely it follows her. It's a reminder of what she has waiting for her. Of what she has to hide from the man that's willing to tear the fabric of the universe apart if it means protecting her.

No matter what happens, the Doctor can never know her fate.

She's so caught up in her thoughts that she doesn't hear the door open at first. Her close friends know they're always able to just come inside, and it's likely the Doctor could pop back in as well. As soon as she realizes she's not alone her hair is dropped, hopefully masking any sign of the fact she's marked with a permanent countdown. She forces a smile, though it doesn't quite meet her eyes. She's able to keep her tone as fond and teasing as ever, which is a win. Banter is exactly what she needs to cheer up right about now.]

Let me guess. You want me to come see something you've done that shows how amazingly clever you are?

Comments

[bossily]

Just a mo'.

[She lifts up for a second but hops off the bed a moment later. She has to actually unzip her boots to kick them off, and she makes quick work stripping out of her jeans and sweater. She doesn't really think anything of being in any varying state of undress around him now, and is quick to climb back into bed to be alongside him. Of course, she has to make herself look ridiculous by stumbling over her own boot along the way. She winds up tripping up and hopping on one foot back into the bed, laughing softly as she hurries to tuck herself in close against him.

The way she slips right in and fits perfectly at his side isn't lost on her. But it's also not something she needs to focus on anymore either. It just feels natural and right.]

I want you to know that no matter what happens, even if we're not able to figure out a way to change things...I'm so grateful to be back. Getting closer to you, it's happier than I've been in a long time.

[It feels important for her to let him know that much, so he doesn't do something reckless or stupid in order to help her out. Just him being here can be enough for now.]

And I'm not sure what that means, but I also know it doesn't have to mean anything. Not if you don't want it to.

[kovach]

[ even the process of undressing to get comfortable feels simple and easier, and it's even only when she has that brief stumble that she even draws a momentary wide eye of his attention, like his hands are prepared to reach out to catch her, managing a brief and subtle smile at the corner of his lips for her self-save before they slide in together, side by side.

from there, it feels as natural as it had the first time, even more so now where it doesn't even require the intimacy to end up together like this. he can't remember the last time he slept by someone's side just for the sake of sleeping without seeking anything else.

but he doesn't expect the words she adds, his eyes watching her quietly as he thinks about what she's telling him,as he tries to piece together the idea of anyone being happier around him.

for a moment, he doesn't say anything at all; holding a conversation usually isn't a difficult task, but with words like that,he isn't sure of what to make it. ]

Clara, I — [ his thumb gives a gentle stroke to her shoulder, lips slightly parted as he peers down to her eyes, like a point of inspiration to better stitch his words. ] I'm not really ... someone who's good with any of this. And chances are, I'm the last asshole whose bed you should be in right now. But —

[ he's definitely no good with this. but he swallows, eyes earnest even in the darkness. ]

I ... like this. With you. [ he raises his fingers, giving a gentle tuck to her hair, combing it back behind her ear. ] Whatever it is.

[bossily]

Then we should make this a habit. With one another.

[There's no reason to define it. No need for labels, no pressure to figure things out right away. She's not good with things like this, and failed her last relationship spectacularly. This isn't any sort of official relationship, but it's still a chance to be happy in between missions and the fallout that comes along with them.

She shifts just enough that she can press a kiss to his lips, soft and tender. Her fingertips touch at his cheek as she does, thumb working along his jawline. There's a dimpled grin on her face as she pulls away, something that makes her look incredibly pleased with herself.]

And maybe eventually we can figure out what this is.

[It's accented with another peck of a kiss.]

[kovach]

[ he hadn't wanted to make anything a habit here, nothing that would make him comfortable, no attachments that would be worth sticking around for. against his liking, he'd ended up forming plenty, a familiarity in seeing some of the same faces, people to chow with in the mess hall, people to keep in shape with at training, people to share a cigarette with —

and now, here there's someone to sleep beside, to breathe a little bit easier with, to quiet down the ghosts, to share in a kiss with like he's already transfixed by the taste of her lips.

no, he really shouldn't make this a habit. but what he's learned fast about clara is that she makes it too easy to not want to say no. ]

Okay. [ he answers quietly, sighing when the stretch of her smile coaxes him to relax. sliding his fingers over hers, he tilts his head to press a kiss gentle to the end of her thumb. ] Consider that an open invitation to my room anytime you want. Which says a lot because I really can't stand having people around.

[ there's a lighter playfulness in those words, his lips giving her a slight smile. ]

[bossily]

[She quickly decides that she likes seeing him like this, content and happy. There's a lightness to him here with her that she doesn't see normally. And she doesn't really see there being any choice but to get to see him like this regularly.]

You keep saying things like that, but your actions with me never quite match up to the words.

[She smiles in return, being cheeky enough to actually wink.]

Which is to say, my room's available too. If you're ever feeling up for a change of scenery.

[Are they...casually discussing where to stay like they've been in an established relationship for months? It sure feels that way. she should be unsettled by how easy and quick it is to fall into these habits with him. But it's hard to be anything but at peace.]

[kovach]

[ it really is a strange feeling, to be this relaxed, to feel that way here, with her, in this place, spiraling around space in this station. he hadn't wanted to wake up from the ice, didn't want to get caught up in bancroft's murder mystery, didn't want to get entangled in helping anyone else, and yet — he's somehow found his way here, already deciding he'd do anything to help out the girl right in front of him.

it doesn't matter that he barely knows her, he usually doesn't have to; he has good instincts about people, that envoy intuition of his or something even more innate that he's always carried, telling him the things often unspoken, the things he can just see in someone. and he sees it in her — someone worth protecting, someone worth saving. ]

Well, you're not just "people".

[ she's something else entirely.

his brow quirks up at her invitation in turn, genuinely surprised. ] You don't have roommates? [ he hasn't actually been to her room and he's never asked about her living arrangements, though he realizes he had walked into her room when they met, to which she made quick work of rejecting him moving in, in her typically peppy clara fashion. ]

[bossily]

[She tries her best to feign innocence with this.]

I technically have the Doctor as roommates. But neither ever step foot inside the room unless I ask them to.

[She actually has the decency to grimace after saying that, because she knows that other people could use the beds. But there still seems to be enough to go around, even with her lucking in to having roommates that never need to sleep.]

[kovach]

You have those goofs as roommates?

[ not that he's necessarily surprised. considering all their history, it makes sense that if anyone's sharing a space, it'd be them, especially if the choice is there. his rooming with kirigan was more of an accident than anything, since he and the other man aren't particularly close.

but from what else he's gathered about clara and her relationship with the doctor, there's a bit of hesitance as he looks at her, eyes visibly caught in thought. ]

And that's ... not a problem? Me being there ... with you.

[ it's a bit of multi-directional question. is it fine with the doctor(s) that he'd be with her? is it fine with her to be with someone else there while she ... has the relationship that she has with them? ]

[bossily]

They're my closest friend in the entire universe. They may be goofs, but they're my goofs.

[She tries to figure out a better way to answer his question beyond that. But her relationship with the Doctor is so layered and complex, she couldn't possibly put it into words.]

I was with someone before. A man named Danny Pink. We weren't together long, but long enough I actually thought I might have a chance at a happy ending. I know better now, obviously, but -

[She has to pause to get out a shaky sigh.]

The Doctor hated him, but when Danny died...he let me manipulate him into trying to save Danny. The Doctor and I, we're close. He's willing to go to hell and back just for me. But it isn't like that. Not in the way you're thinking. I'm not sure it ever can be, or that they ever want it to be. So your being there with me isn't a problem because I want you to be there. Besides, they're married to River. She's here on the station with us.

[kovach]

[ it's the first she talks about danny pink, another notch to something that seems to not have gone right for her, however it might have ended (someone she'd try to save; it always comes down to saving someone — it's the same for him too). he feels his throat go a little dry when she talks about happy endings, because after everything, the clara he'd first met seemed like someone so determined to chase after one.

but he was the same once too. he thought he and quell could have some kind of future together, even if, at the time, they were already deep into a war where they were already prepared to be sacrifices. it was the only time he thought happy was in the cards for him.

this thing with clara, it's many things, something without a definition as they've both agreed, but whatever he thought was complicated about it, every word she says only seems to add another layer of that. ]

Wait, they ... have a wife?

[ that's ... the first he hears of it. another complexity in whatever he's tried to shape out from what clara's detailed of her relationship with them. but he falls back on certain words in particular — i want you to be there.

(you're the person who's here. so you stay.) ]

As long as you don't make me sleep in their bed, I can work with that.

[bossily]

Fair enough.

[She laughs, amused by the fact he'd even think to bring that up. But about two seconds later, her nose wrinkles up and she almost sounds offended when the next words spill out of her mouth.]

Why would I make you sleep in their bed? I have a perfectly good bed. Honestly.

[Like she'd let him sleep anywhere else.

She hasn't even gotten to the whole Doctor having a wife bit yet. It's complicated, and she's not sure she's ready to dive into what little she knows about River & The Doctor's relationship. She'll just stay in the land of acting like she's truly offended he'd dare suggest he sleep in the Doctor's bed.]

[kovach]

[ he's gonna have plenty questions about the wife thing, although maybe that's more of a question for the doctor. it's mostly strange that in all the time he's been around both of them, neither of them had made mention of it. adding one everything with clara — well, it's a pretty fucking weird situation that he's still trying to map out, more for the sake of being inclined to make sense of things than to leave mysteries surfacing in the air.

but she's a distraction with her pout, with her nose all crinkled in faux annoyance. it's easy enough to be reeled back in by it, lips smirking as he brings up a hand to gently pinch the tip of her nose. ]

Don't know, but I got long legs. [ ones that he curves in close against hers, nudging against her thigh. ] Might get in the way. You might wanna steal all the extra room for yourself.

[bossily]

[Her much stumpier legs nudge right back against his, her foot playfully trailing along upward. Of course, she's also attempting to snip at his hand as he pinches at her nose. The end result is her laughing and curling her fingers around his wrist to pry his hand away. She ends up pressing her thumb against his pulse point, rubbing lightly.]

Trust me when I say that if your legs ever get in the way, I'll be sure to eject you from the bed.

[She's far more likely to either steal all the blankets, or ditch the blankets in the name of intense cuddling. But the ridiculous threat is still out there in the open all the same. And she's sure he completely believes her.]

[kovach]

Oh, yeah? Well, now I'm fucking terrified.

[ though, considering the way he answers that with a smirk, there's very little terror from the threat of her kicking him out to the floor. even if a part of him is entirely convinced she really might have the eager fierceness to get those shorter legs to beat his body off of the mattress.

as she grazes a touch along his wrist, she twists his body to lay more on his back, his other hand sliding against his shoulder blades to coax her towards using his chest as a pillow if she wants to get comfortable, even using the tangle of their legs to trap one of hers between his own. ]

You can always trap 'em down. Make sure they don't bother you.

[bossily]

I could strip down further and trap them down between my thighs, if you like.

[She teases, though she does let him guide her right into getting comfortable using his chest as a pillow. With how emotionally charged this conversation has been tonight, it's probably not the best idea to let it all dissolve into sex. But the physical intimacy between them isn't a distraction, it isn't something she's carelessly just using.

There's an element of craving that closeness, even though the sort of intimacy they're sharing at the moment is just as special to her. Clara Oswald is affectionate, but her walls generally keep out hardcore cuddling and flirting post emotional bombshell conversations. Not even Jane Austen had earned the honor. Takeshi Kovacs had managed to make himself right at home in her heart in record time, bulldozing over those defenses she had built up.

She should have been afraid of the uncertainty of what that meant. Terrified of getting too close only to have to let him go when it was time to leave. But she only could feel contentment, and turned a blind eye to feeling or thinking about anything but the here and now in his bed. And for once, she wasn't going to allow herself to feel guilty for that.]

[kovach]

Now that's a hell of a promise.

[ it might not be the best course of action tonight, but it's definitely something inspiring to keep in mind, particularly for the next time they end up sleeping over in a room together, his or hers. but he also knows that whatever this is, with their promises, it's grown to something beyond that. if it really had been just about sex, something that seemed like it was meant to be in that first rush, when the urgency had come from a willing escape from heavier topics, then he'd already found an excuse to shut this all down.

but he draws her in against his chest, close enough to feel the warmth of her against the steady quiet beating of his heart, and he wonders if he's seeking something from this too. an escape, a distraction — ? that he could get from anyone, maybe even on this station. clara, though, was something else altogether, coating herself over him with something that's helped to ease back the demons in his head. ]

Sounds like a plan for breaking in your bed. Next time.

[ next time. a promise that he'll be there, that they'll keep doing this. if it's all a mistake, then he'll keep making it with her. ]