OPEN |

[aurable]

CHARACTERS: Drift and YOU
LOCATION: Various—Infirmary, Sunlight Room primarily with individual prompts in other locations
DATE: Dec. 1-5th
CONTENT: Several people have told Drift to remain in the infirmary for a few days after SEAL Team Hot Girl Shit fed the orb. Spoiler: He does not do this.
WARNINGS: description of (robot) severed limbs + odds-on mentions of suicide and substance abuse

INFIRMARY

The last thing Drift wanted to do now was dream— every memory or random sensation his subconscious attempted to catalog and make sense was a deafening echo chamber and the last place he wanted to be. Pulling himself out of the shallow grave of an artificially sedated rest made his vision blur. Everything he saw was like photographs burned with double exposure; the real overlayed with the imaginary. He thinks there was a hand over his chest—he imagines a voice over the drowned-out words of whoever was really at his bedside. ("You can't keep doing this to yourself, kid")

Only one person ever called him that, and they were long gone. That sharp pang of reality made Drift redouble his efforts to make sense of the oily stains that made up for the outlines of people moving around—rousing himself until he was pushing himself upright. His greatsword was propped against the wall at his (comically large) bedside. The amber siphoning gemstone inlaid at the hilt was visibly cracked—nearly cloven in two and only held together by the handle itself. His already aching spark stuttered at the sight of it.

(Take care of her.)

Drift frowned as he recalled Remi's words—drawn up at the sight of what it cost to bring the orb back. Drift was a mess. His color was dull, and his eyes barely a flickering blue light as he took stock of what damage he had taken by feeling alone. Some of his injuries were internal, but most had been just exhaustion from the strain.

Turning to the first person he sees, Drift voices the only question on his mind: "Is everyone okay?"

SUNLIGHT ROOM

Popular opinion was that a holoform was only a means of subterfuge—play-acting at being something more palatable for the sake of others. Drift saw the logic there but disagreed and found the idea limiting. Here, on a station designed with a crew manned by organics in mind, a holorform was just convenient. Drift took a more metaphysical approach to the whole concept of his human guise. Some of his fellow 'bots likened it to piloting a tiny suit, others to sleepwalking without real sensation. Drift, on the other hand, felt himself wholly like this. As close to a human as he could be, he was unburdened by the constraints of his massive frame still laid up and healing.

At least here, Drift could stand by the brook and feel the artificially winter-chilled water just starting to frost at the shoreline flow over his fingertips. Anyone who had met Drift before like this would note his appearance was more drawn with an impressive landscape of unkempt stubble on his face. He rises from the brook and sits back on a large boulder—idly twirling a sheathed sword by its hilt in his hand with its end poking into the frosted grass.

"Nice, isn't it?"

WILDCARD

( ooc: please feel free to hmu at bretons or bitchard#0228 for starters )

Comments

[scarcastically]

Isn't that what I'm doing now?

[ still, he does feel a little sheepish. erik runs a hand over his dreads, briefly combing them back. ]

I needed some time. To recover and get my head on straight. Didn't really think I'd die twice in my own dreams.

[aurable]

A fair point. [ Drift laughs airily at that. ]

That would make two of us. [ Drumming his fingers around the hilt of the sword held loosely in one hand, Drift glances down at where his foot draws a line in the frost-kissed grass. ] I'm still getting my head on straight.

[scarcastically]

A work in progress.

I didn't mean to put you in that position, though. It already happened a long time ago and I . . . I guess I never quite knew how to fight back for my life after that.

[aurable]

Half-baked, more like.

Don't- [ Drift put up a hand ] think you have to apologize over something you had no control over. It would be poor of me to hold it against you.

You wanted your dignity that should be admired, not condemned.

[scarcastically]

Honestly? I'm not sure what I really wanted. I was just . . . I keep losing.

The world just took it all from me.

[aurable]

Between you and me? [ Thumbing at the hilt of the sword, the blade slipped out an inch before he let it fall back into place. ]

Before I found Remi, it took everything in me not to burn that castle to the ground after finding out it was 'alive' for what happened. For being reminded of what I've lost.

[scarcastically]

[ erik glances at him. ]

What made you stop?

[ how do you stop the burning? ]

[aurable]

Well, it was a pretty big castle.

[ Drift smiles in a way that doesn't reach his eyes. ]

[scarcastically]

You're a pretty big robot.

[aurable]

And, at the end of the day, I'm also supposed to be one of the 'good guys.'

[scarcastically]

[ erik shrugs. ]

Seems overrated.

[aurable]

Maybe. Hey, we saved a princess and set off a few fireworks of our own. I thought humans loved endings like that? [ Drift reclined back on the rock and looked like his own recent accomplishments bored him. ]

[scarcastically]

[ erik shifts on his feet awkwardly before he responds. ]

When I was a kid, my dad told me stories about the Black Panther. A great king in a land where technology grew out of plants and the soil. Blessed with special abilities and wealth. He ruled all the tribes and they were prosperous. A perfect place.

[ a beat. ]

Then the Black Panther killed my dad. Left his body cold on the floor for me to find. I was seven.

[aurable]

Seven. [ Drift echoed the word, not sounding shocked but resigned to some terrible constant. He only knew so much about humans, but that sounded young, far too young to know death, let alone the death of a father. ]

And for what? Our greatest paragons only ever step down into their gutters because the ones they left there grew too loud.

[scarcastically]

My people endured slavery, countless tragedies. The system keeps them beaten down, keeps them hurting. He wanted to help, but Wakanda said no. Said the secret of their prosperity had to be protected.

That's what he died for. That's the kind of place I lived in. Fairytales don't get to breathe.

[aurable]

You do anything to advance yourself, and they move the finish line. [ There was a snarling curl to his lips as Drift spat the words. Dead End might be space detritus floating in a vacuum with the rest of Cybertron, but part of him would always linger there. ]

[scarcastically]

[ erik gives a tired shrug. ]

I used to — I wanted to believe so bad. I think a part of me still does. But it's not . . . It doesn't come to people like me.

Glad everyone got their fairytale ending. But it leaves me behind. It always does.

[aurable]

[ The fire that started to light up behind Drift's eyes flickered out as quick as it flared. He just looked tired. ]

I know, well— I can't claim to know everything you've gone through or its history. Trying to draw direct parallels inevitably invites misunderstanding, and I'm ignorant of most of Earth's history. But—

Being left behind is a pain that's followed me all my life. 'The grass is always green,' right?

[scarcastically]

Something like that, yeah.

[ erik rubs the back of his neck, still not used to sharing these things. but he's come out of the other side of the crucible. he's making . . . changes. and he's leaving killmonger behind. ]

But I take it you've got something else on your mind.

[aurable]

Something like that. [ The following lull in the conversation lingered until it started to turn into awkward silence.

Drift moved to make room for Erik at some point because he couldn't possibly enjoy standing. What with his organic legs and all. ]

I've got a lot on my mind, I usually do. [ Picking up the thread of conversation like it had never dropped, Drift looked back onto the pond. ] Much as I would love to say, I came out here to meditate and rebalance myself; I'm just trying not to go ballistic. Not really good for my image, you know?

[scarcastically]

[ erik hums. that's relatable. ]

Maybe you just need to stretch yourself into a fight. You need to visualise something you can beat.

[aurable]

[ Finishing the job at beating Megatron's helm in sprung to mind, but Drift only flushed at the shame of his earlier behavior. He still had no idea how many of the others overheard that fight.

Instead, he only rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled humorlessly ]

Normally I'm the one giving out advice like that.

[scarcastically]

Yeah, well. Sometimes you gotta hear it from someone else.

[ erik holds out his fist for drift to boop. ]

[aurable]

The first lesson is always to stay humble.

[ Drift boops back before knocking the back of his hand against Erik's. Something he learned from Rodimus. ]

[scarcastically]

[ erik chuckles. ]

What's the next one, senpai?