( OPEN ) MISSION 3.1 | time shifts, dreams fade, ripples blur the illusion

[soups]

CHARACTERS: Jiang Yanli & You
LOCATION: Jiang Yanli's Dreamscape
DATE: Throughout the mission
CONTENT: Having fallen into a deep sleep, Jiang Yanli's dreams and memories play out for others to see and take part in
WARNINGS: Possible violence, mentions of death, canon spoilers guaranteed to be mentioned. Look below for specific warnings for each memory.

⇢ LOTUS PIER: relatively tame, more nostalgic and wistful than traumatic
⇢ JIN CLAN CHAMBERS: a little more psychologically complicated; involves issues of loss of child (abstract) and abandoned motherhood
⇢ NIGHTLESS CITY: obvious death and undead yanli. totally lost in the dream sauce here. injury is highly likely.

If you want to talk out another memory to enjoy, PM me or hit me up at haseul!

Comments

[petsthedog]

I ain't kind.

[Spills from his lips before he even thinks of it. At this point, it's a reflex, a kneejerk. He's too uncomfortable with others having an opinion like that of him.

Normally, he'd let it go with that; the way another person handles their regret is not really any of his business. But at the back of his mind, he hears echoes of the conversations he and Erik have had, and he can't help but hesitate.]

...But uh. It might be a good idea to think about it, though. The right and wrong bits. I mean...if there's a lotta shit that happens at once, you gotta be sure you pull the right thread, yeah? So the change sticks and shit.

[Ugh, he's definitely not as good with his words as Erik. He tries again.]

Like...if all this starts with your husband dyin', you gotta figure out why your brother did it, right? So you can decide if you need to stop him and shit. ...And if you don't, how to keep your brother from gettin' killed by the angry mob.

...Point is. Knowin' the right and wrong parts is important.

[soups]

❰ jiang yanli has another brother, whose rough words and speaking betrays how kind and gentle he can be in his heart at times. she knows in situations of denial of these facts, there's less to be gained by insisting on them. so she smiles, pensively listening to the rest of aragaki's words.

there's a complicated admission involved in this: ❱ In those cases, I don't have the power to do so, even if they were what must have been done. I cannot regret what I have no control over, and either of those situations...there was nothing I would have any ability to do. My word is not weighted enough to talk anyone down, and my brother's power is unmatched in any circumstance, I think. Unlike others, I have to say that I was not gifted with that level of importance.

❰ which is why her regret is something she has total control and say over, far enough back in time to unravel all these threads — to completely take them out of the situation. ❱ In the world I hopefully have the opportunity to create, if I'm gifted hindsight...perhaps that would make a difference. But I have clear doubt in my mind.

[petsthedog]

I get it. I ain't shit either.

[Not everyone was meant to live a life of any significance. In some cases, it was for the better that they didn't, given their proclivity to fuck everything up.

...Yet he's still thinking about Erik, and how the man was often frustrated with him for getting mired in his own powerlessness. He still thinks his situation is different, that trying to take down an entire corporation on the possibility that the fight to end the Dark Hour is based on a lie is absurd when he is only a single scruffy orphan gutter trash, but this sits wrong wrong nonetheless--perhaps not least because it sounds so much more personal.]

But you wanted to know why he did it, right? And you say he'd never want you to be hurt. So you can confront him before it happens and ask. Pretend you overheard somethin' or whatever. You don't think he's right, you don't gotta convince him, but you can warn your husband. Or if you do, you can help your brother escape the mob before they can get him. Stash him away somewhere, or send people the wrong direction lookin'...there's other ways than just bein' good at a fight or important enough to stop anyone.

[soups]

❰ in normal circumstances, they would all be decent suggestions — and they are all, indeed, things she wishes she could be dropped into her own story to do. alas, things aren't so simple. the logistics are all off. there's no way he knows the context of her brother being banished, having barely seen him or knowing exactly where he was outside of somewhere on a hill of corpses. how she doesn't know how to warn her husband of something that even she doesn't even understand the mechanics of. and that she ran after wei wuxian, only stopping to put down the son now in her arms to try and stop him from leaving her sight — and if she had a room secret enough that the rest of the furious jin clan wouldn't find, she may just have tried to keep him there.

her smile softens to one of nostalgia, pausing in her constant motion to take a good long look at the details of her son's face, to maybe try and create an image, lapsing time, so that she can see what he may look like in the future. she can only guess, but it helps to keep his features in focus. ❱

All that I know is that I want to achieve our goal of collecting as many orbs as possible. I cannot undo the regret that I have given them...but if I were to succeed in this journey, I would do all that is in my power to ensure the happiness of all those around me. ❰ the longer she holds, the more it pains her to know what she may sacrifice again. each time, a choice of her own design. ❱ Even if Jin Rulan's spirit is instead born to another, I will know him as I know him here. Whatever I must scream from the mountains, or if I must fall onto another blade...these tasks will be done in the name of these corrections.