kovach: (■ 157)
— TAKESHI . KOVACS ([personal profile] kovach) wrote in [community profile] ximilialog 2021-09-12 04:28 pm (UTC)

[ coming out here for both a drink and a smoke, he hadn't necessarily signed up for existential conversation. but maybe it's better to be talking to someone actually real than staying up in his bed and hearing the voice of those long dead still whispering in his ear.

then again, maybe this isn't an improvement, particularly when the older man settles down to sit across from him at the table, like he's not really going to have much of an option but to participate in this exchange whether he wants to or not.

especially when the words spoken speak too much to what he deals with every day. ]


Maybe that's because there really isn't a difference at all. [ he brings the cigarette to his lips, inhaling, smoke seeping from his mouth when he continues to speak. ] Even awake, we only imagine that we're in control. But everything's already shaped us — every word, every move, every thought — it's conditioned into us, and that right there already weakens us to vulnerability. It's just a matter of someone else figuring out what makes those things tick. And being asleep? It's just a collapsing montage of all of the above.

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